So, it’s been a seriously long time since I’ve written. I have been busy with a bunch of other things (excuses, excuses) but I had to take a few minutes to post this recent SNL skit. This time, the characters, including Justin Timberlake and Adam Sandburg, are on a different kind of boat but it is equally as funny. 

Enjoy and I hope to be back again soon.

**Well I can’t seem to get the video to embed properly but the link is below so you can still check it out. It’s worth the extra click, promise.

SNL Immigrant Tale

Ok, so I know Hollywood couples split up on a daily basis. Marriages can’t take the spotlight, celebrities acquire wandering eyes, yadda, yadda. So it really shouldn’t come as a huge shock that Warren Lieberstein and Angela Kinsey (Angela from The Office) have just separated.

angela_warren

Except that I’m really sad about it.

The couple just had a baby girl, Isabel Ruby Lieberstein, about 8 months ago. It just seems so sad that they are splitting up after just starting a family.

Also (fun facts), Angela’s best friend in real life is Jenna Fisher who plays Pam on the show. And Warren’s brother* is Paul Lieberstein who plays Toby. I completely love that the actors and actresses are such a tight-knit group. It makes me feel all warm and fuzzy on the inside. Like despite how awful some things are (like this separation or the ebola virus or finding a rogue hair in your lunch that is obviously not yours), somehow, someway everything will be ok in the end. And it is my sincerest hope that Jenna Fisher (Pam) and John Krasinski (Jim) fall in love for real…unless I get him first of course. In which case, watch your back Pammy, because as much as I adore you, I have no problem taking you down if you attempt to come between us.

Consider this your first and final warning.

 

 

*My mistake. I wrote that Paul was Warren’s uncle. Thanks for the correction!

**photo from evilbeetgossip.com

Lindsay Lohan is headed for another rehab clinic and/or psychiatric ward. 

Lindsay is pretty much surviving off Red Bull, coffee and cigarettes, is hardly sleeping and making strange phone-calls at odd hours of the night. All that combined with the stress of her rocky relationship with Ronson is clearly taking its toll in a dangerous way…”

Lindsay Lohan

“‘…she looks very thin in her recent photos,” said Kenneth Best, D.C. of FBE Holistic Health and Fitness Center in West Hollywood. “She has possibly lost a lot of weight from nerves, and lack of sleep can put a person on overdrive where their body doesn’t have sufficient time rebuild and rejuvenate itself. The body begins breaking down its lean muscle mass for fuel and the person not only looks thin but ravaged.’” (FOXnews.com)

Lindsay Lohan

 

“…Lindsay heard that Chace Crawford [Gossip Girl star] and Emile Hirsch [actor] were hanging out at Southern Hospitality for drinks…she showed up uninvited and unannounced. She caused quite a scene so Chace left to go back to his place for some more fun….”

Lindsay Lohan

“‘…Lindsay showed up uninvited to Chace’s apartment and was not allowed in,” the source reveals, adding that she instead headed to the airport to fly home to [Samantha Ronson]. “ (Ok! Magazine)

Yikes. 

Someone needs to step in and help this poor girl out. I mean, I know she’s annoying and all but there’s obviously something very wrong with her. I am worried for what’s going to happen if she doesn’t change these self-destructive activities soon.

That was my sympathetic cry for help for Lindsay. Now that that’s over, I can get back to being mostly sarcastic and rude. Phew. Being nice is exhausting!

 

**photos from idontlikeyouinthatway.com, thesuperficial.com

 

Ok, I’m still thinking entirely too much about the last post and how sad it is that Aubrey O’Day probably was once a relatively talented, cute gal who now is a few bad outfits (or nude photos, or hair bleachings) shy of being number on on my HATE LIST. Let’s journey back to a softer, more innocent time in Aubrey’s life via a lovely photo montage. Because, really, who doesn’t love a good montage?

 

Brunette Aubrey O'Day
Aubrey O'Day
aubrey-oday
aubrey-o-day
Holy downfall. 
Maybe I should title this post “Mr. and Mrs. O’Day Must Be So Proud” or “Move Over, Tara Reid.”

Fun story.

So I just moved into a new apartment and mail is still coming from previous tenants. Usually it’s bills or junk mail, but every once in a while it’s a coupon book or fun magazine that I decide will best serve its purpose by belonging to me. Whether or not this is morally (or legally?) sound, I don’t really care to think about. Anywho, I usually just add whatever it is to the stack of magazines on my coffee table for my roommates and I to check out. 

Friday I grabbed said mail and there was a magazine made out to some random guy in a crisp plastic sleeve. I couldn’t see the cover b/c it was blacked out (if you already know where this is going you are way ahead of me). I was in a hurry to get dinner started and just threw it on the stack of other magazines. 

Needless to say, I forgot about it until Sunday morning, when a visiting guy friend from Richmond picks it up and exclaims, “LIZ. Why do you have a PLAYBOY in your apartment??” I probably should’ve been mildly embarrassed, but as I really had no idea what it was decided to just laugh it off. So the group of us hanging out rips off the cover and proceeds to objective analyze the entire thing. And here’s the question I’m posing to you, dear readers…and maybe it’s just me, but…

Does anyone else think cover-girl Aubrey O’Day (from Danity Kane) look like crap???

 

Aubrey O'Day

I mean, besides looking weirdly gold, her face looks more blow-up-doll than usual and her pose seems very awkward and uncomfortable. The rest of the photos look like crap to me as well. I’m not going to post the semi-nude ones on the site but if you want to check it out, look at Idontlikeyouinthatway.com

I feel like she’s too weird and trashy to be featured on a Playboy. And that’s sort of saying a lot, right?


**photo from idontlikeyouinthatway.com

I just spent a very long time laughing hysterically at the following website with my roommates…

F My Life

Enjoy.

(It’s good to be back, people.)

Seriously folks, it’s been a while. 

I’m glad to say that I’m returning and haven’t forgotten everyone out there in cyberspace (or you, Ryan H.). I’ll start planning a fantastic, witty comeback post for sometime in the new year. I now know how Britney must feel after the drugs, baldness, and custody battles came to an end and she realized working out and oh, I don’t know, not being crazy would do wonders for her comeback career. Like maybe I did something really insane this past month and dropped off the face of the world just to figure out that all I really want to do with my life is post witticisms about famous people who make dubious fashion and life choices. 

But that’s one secret I’ll never tell. 

Xoxo. 

 

(That Gossip Girl reference is dedicated you, MF – as if you didn’t already know.)

Karolina Kurkova does not have a belly button.

Don’t believe me? Check it:

“[The belly button’s] absence was noticed this week when the 24-year-old graced a US catwalk for lingerie giant Victoria Secret. While most of us have an “outie” or an “innie”, Ms Kurkova has a smooth indentation (although sometimes a tummy button is airbrushed onto her photos in post-production).[BBC report]

My first two reactions:

1. HA. I knew those models were too perfect to be real.

2. Um, that’s the creepiest thing I’ve ever seen. Can someone find out more because my mind is SPINNING, and I need answers NOW.

 

**photo from thesuperficial.com

These crazy kids just can’t stop fighting lately! Could it be because an overly intelligent blogger named Liz recently predicted that their breakup is inevitable? Here’s the latest battle between Samantha and Lindsay:

“We hear that things got pretty tense at London’s Boujis Wednesday night after DJ Samantha Ronson spied her lover Lindsay Lohan chilling with her former squeeze Calum Best.

According to eyewitnesses, Sam was leaning into her cocktails when she saw Lindsay on the dance floor with the former model. Calum is said to have been the one who came over to her and Lindsay was enjoying the attention — and the flirting.

Sam is said to have gotten so angry that the two gals had to be restrained to keep them from beating on each other.”

[from radaronline.com story]

I had to google “Calum Best” because I had no recollection of him. I got tons of results with his name and the words ‘cocaine,’ ‘hookers,’ ‘sex tape,’ ‘orgies.’ Oh, and this lovely photo:

 

Seems like an upstanding young man.

I can’t believe I’m about to type this, but Lindsay is better off with Samantha. Kiss and make up, ladies.

 

**photos from thesuperficial.com, popcornnation.com

So, Paris Hilton and Benji Madden broke up, which is so sad considering how precious they were together.

Hahahahaha, kidding. I remember thinking how weird it was for them to be dating in the first place. Now Paris can go back to being the ditzy, flirty, party girl she always was, and Benji can go back to, um, whatever he does when he’s not getting tattooed or being photographed with a blank expression on his face.

Looks like they’re going to have to return all those matching outfits though. How sad for them. I hate when that happens.

 

**photos from thesuperficial.com, people.com